First Date Expectations

Good question. Tension can be a killer and the fact that the more you worry about the tension the more tense you get, just makes things worse.
The reason for this is that the brains fright or flight response designed to keep you out of scary/harmful situations is alerted and starts pumping adrenalin into your body in case you need to protect yourself in some way.

The trick to breaking this vicious cycle is simply to acknowledge it. It's like the old Alcoholics Anonymous 12 step program, If you want to break an addiction, or something you do but would rather not do, acknowledge it fully first.

So simply make light of it! Discuss how nervous you have been and how silly you feel about it. HAVE A LAUGH and ask how the other person deals with it. Opening up, stating the obvious and making light instantly interrupts the brains perception of a stressful situation. In addition these kinds of frank, lighthearted observations can go a long way to relive the other persons stress levels and help you bond.
Along with using humour and bringing the stress out into the open, it’s always good to encourage the other person to talk about themselves. Don’t pry but use something you have in common like dating and ask relevant questions such as "what's your funniest /worst dating experience" “what do you think of ????” – Then listen to their answers for clues to other conversations and interests you could talk about. Before you know it you will forget you were under pressure at all.

B & G